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Friday Snippet: PBOTL — 11 Comments

  1. I like the idea of this, especially during a time when polar bears are really and truly facing extinction. I have to admit that had a hard time suspending my disbelief though–I just couldn’t get past my own personal sense of the improbability of the whole idea. You know, the lack of opposable thumbs sort of thing that could hinder polar bears from using a laptop.

    The writing is good and I like the pace and exposition but I needed that little oomph of something that would make me go wow, I really want to know how polar bears can string wireless. I just couldn’t in this little snippet. Perhaps if the PBN had a secret ally–activist humans, aliens, monkeys, I don’t know. Just something to keep me inside the story instead of distracted wondering how swimming bears have anything to do with wiring a network or where the bear is going to hide his laptop in his cage or etc.

    Does that make sense? I really do like the idea and the writing is strong. It will be interesting to see what you do with this piece!

  2. I know what you mean, Crystal. That’s one of the crucial things I have to work out, and your comments coincide with the feedback I got in the critique of the novel. Thanks for the feedback.

  3. What a clever and unique idea! Yeah, smooth some of the suspension of disbelief a little in revision, but I’m very intrigued with PBN. Ha! I love it.

  4. She wants to live among humans? I’m intrigued enough to want to read on, and figure out how they are going to achieve this. Otherwise Crystal pinged the same things I was curious about.

  5. One of the “bad” things I did was get caught up in Inuit’s story and drop the PBN thread completely by the middle of the book.

    I’m going to have to change some things for the sentient aspects to work — probably go to a telepathic phenomena vice a technical solution.

  6. You already know what the weakness is, so I won’t be pointing that out. What I’ll concentrate on is the idea. Unique and lovely! Hope you pursue editing, rewriting, and getting this story published.

  7. I always wondered about those bears…

    You’ve got lots of really good ideas here. When you work out the communications part, this one will be on its way.

  8. I had no problems to suspend disbelief and accept a world where polar bears have wireless.

    After reading the comments, though, I wondered how they would avoid their sites to pop up on Google. Or maybe it could be fun to have humans think ít’s a game out there where everyone pretends to be a polar bear – like Secret Life or World of Warcraft and whatever. 🙂

  9. So the pandas will be studying the scientists while the scientists are studying the pandas? This would probably lead to the pandas having a very skewed idea of human interaction. That would probably lead to some interesting encounters once your protagonist escapes. Very interesting.
    P.S. Is your protagonist a male or a female? And, it they are facing extinction, will the bears attempt to breed while your protag is visiting these other zoos? Just a thought.

  10. That is a really good idea, Gabriele!

    Ann, you’re on track. Inuit is female. There is a love story in the book (no live polar bear sex will be found on the page though). And there is room for more books as the idea of polar bears integrating into human society expands. Which, of course, brings many more cultural and independence concerns to the forefront.