Holly Lisle posts The Five Smartest Mistakes I Ever Made and challenges others with blogs to do the same. I’ll have to give this some thought, because, while I know I’ve made way more than five mistakes in my life, how have I dealt with the biggies?

I’ve often said the #1 mistake I’ve made in life, even bigger than marrying my first husband, was buying a house in San Antonio in 1983 at 15% interest rate at top dollar in a neighborhood where my then-25 year-old broken down wreck of a tract home builder house was the last to sell for at least two of the four years I lived there. (I know this because when I was sitting in the tax office to protest an increase in tax rate, the guy before me used my house as an example and said it was the last one to sell in two years. Made it easy for me to get my assessment reduced.) What did I learn? In some instances, my mom’s advice that you always pay for your home first is not necessarily viable. After five years, this house went back, and the rest of my credit remained intact. The alternative would have been to completely ruin all aspects of my credit, which would, possibly, have had a negative impact on my career. In this instance, the house was an albatross, and once I got it from around my neck, I was able to recover financially, but I’m still leery as all get out about buying a house. That was a big burn, and while the scar tissue doesn’t show, it’s extensive. (Bottom line: Don’t just trust what’s worked in the past–do your homework.)

The #2 mistake I’ve made in life was marrying my first husband. Even as a teenager I believed one shouldn’t marry until they were at least 25. I didn’t listen to myself (it’s easy to say that when there isn’t anyone interested in you). I learned a lot of cool things from my first hubby–how to drive a stick shift, how to ride a motorcycle, how to work on cars, probably a couple other things. He encouraged me to go into the Air Force after I learned making toy drums in Western Massachusetts for minimum wage wasn’t all it was cracked up to be (he was the reason I was doing that, too). I was ready to return to school but couldn’t afford it (so I thought), and the Air Force would train me. (25 years later, the Air Force and I still have a relationship.) But I didn’t have to marry the man to obtain those skills/benefits. And I shouldn’t have. The man wouldn’t have known the truth if it had hit him upside the head. To this day there are things I have no idea if they were true about him or not. Thankfully, I no longer care. I would have done well to dump him early on–as soon as some of the strange and all-too-fantastic stories came out. For some reason, I didn’t, and things have never been the same. He was the first guy I trusted, and I shouldn’t have. Fortunately, it could have been worse.

The #3 mistake was dropping out of college the first time. At the time, it seemed as if people were graduating from college and getting jobs in McDonalds. What I didn’t realize is that will always happen. An education does not guarantee an ability to function in life. Common sense, while not common, comes in handy. I’d gotten “D”s in College Algebra and Chemistry I, so I figured my dream of becoming a veterinarian was shot. No, I just needed to learn to study (something I’d never had to do before, and I graduated #32 in my high school class of 215). By the time I left after the first year, I’d gotten my studies back on track (ex-hubby gets credit for encouraging that too, because I’d met him in February). Had I returned, I probably would have figured out things a little better. Or maybe not. Lots of things in my life wouldn’t have happened if I’d gone back to Ohio State for my sophomore year on schedule, and I wouldn’t be where I am today. Where would I be? I’ll always wonder. That decision took me down a huge fork in my lifepath. I believe I’d be OK, but I do wonder what that would mean. (NOTE: You’ll notice my dream of becoming a veterinarian. I also wanted to be a writer, but I didn’t think I could make a living at it, so I didn’t focus on that. Lesson: Do what you love. You’ll find a way to make the living.)

The #4 mistake was dropping out of college the second time. After I got to Montana, I started back at college. Then we got involved in a business venture that was going to render college unecessary, so I stopped taking classes. While this was a mistake, I can only suppose what I learned from it was I’m not big on being in business for myself. If I am, it has to be something I truly believe in and that I don’t have to depend upon my success for survival. The more I learn about the business side of the writing profession the more I’m reminded of this experience. By the time I begin working the business side of writing, I’ll have a solid retirement income, and I won’t have to count on it for survival, so I might do OK with it. (Between Fall, 1978, and May, 1994, I earned three associates degrees [instructor in technology; electronic systems technology; and electronic engineering specialist], one bachelors degree [professional writing], and one masters degree [adult education]. It took me on a journey encompassing nine institutions, but I finally finished. Between 1994 and 1996, I started an education specialist degree, between masters and doctorate, and I completed all but the project for that degree and let it slide when I got transferred to NYC–I don’t regret it; I got everything I wanted out of that program–enough English credits to teach at the junior college level someday. Some might say I’m over-educated, but my college experience has never been a waste of time.)

The #5 mistake was…I’m not sure. One candidate is too personal to discuss here, but it was definitely one of those major “fork in the road” events. For another candidate, I haven’t found the “smart” part of it yet. There must be others, but I suspect the silver lining has become so clear, I no longer see them as mistakes. And there may be others that other people would see as mistakes but I never have.

So, to paraphrase a recent advertising campaign, what’s in your closet?