This has been an odd month for me. I’m feeling generally positive. Despite that, something is still off. I’m struggling to focus and pull together a plan of action. I can force myself to do things that simply must be done. I can be somewhat reactive to tasks, but I struggle to formulate a cohesive plan of action to execute.

I still have the Coupe listed on Facebook Marketplace. I had one person from Brenham come look at it, but he decided to pass — he was interested in yard art, and I think it might work for something better than that. I also listed the chain link and gate in the green space. I’ve had inquiries, but nobody has come to look or purchase the full bundle yet. Yesterday, someone just wanted a section of chain link, and I sold him that.

I’m still waiting for quotes for several projects I need someone to do — sewer line replacement at Crockett and the upstairs back bathroom completion at the house on the most pressing. When the time is right, the contractor will appear. New cabinets and sinks have been installed at Crockett. We finally have a full-size double basin sink in the kitchen. We have a utility sink in the waiting room, and the sink and vanity that were in there have been installed in the hallway bathroom.

I sold two clarinets at the end of May. My sister wants the third one. That leaves about 25 more instruments to find homes for. I’m not rushing that process.

I’m watching the Outlander series for the second time. I’m in Season 5. Brianna is making a paper airplane to commemorate their first anniversary and saying she wants their marriage to grow strong. I’m reminded that as a couple who has time traveled from the 20th Century to the 18th Century, they have a common frame of reference other people around them don’t share. I lost a 38-year common frame of reference three years ago, and I’m too late in my life to meet and establish that again. It’s one of the things I mourn.

I continue to breathe, because someday, I’ll be glad I did.