You’ve heard the ad on the radio that opens with a woman saying, “I’ll never forget the day my son said he hated me.” (At which point, I roll my eyes and think, every mother has heard that at least once from their kid — probably more — get over it!) Then she goes on to talk about how she and her husband developed the “Total Transformation Program” to get their kids to listen to them and oh what a wondrous change ensued, and now, you, too, can experience this wonderful program for FREE.  Right.  Has anyone ever bit on this deal?  What were your results?

Anyway.  I began thinking this morning, after taking away a bag of dried tomato basil bread from Lady who’d gotten it off the counter for the second time (I put it in the cupboard, so that’s dealt with) that I needed a Total Transformation Program for cats.  One cat in particular.

She fights with her siblings.  She gets on the counter and the tables.  If meat is left on the counter to thaw, you can count on Lady trying to get into it. Bread is a new one, but I guess it’s kind of the same — the challenge of the forbidden fruit.

She usually lays around looking innocent.  Sometimes she even crosses her paws (so adorable).  But she can be a terror.  And she’s getting grumpier.

The day before yesterday, I wondered if the separation from Rossie has lessened her animosity in any way, so I left the parlor door open and went upstairs to observe.  I went into the den to get something off the printer, and by the time I returned to the bedroom, Lady was nose first at the dresser — Rossie’s preferred hiding place. I heard some growling.  Rossie was asserting she didn’t want to be bothered.  I watched.  Lady began scratching at the floor under the front of the dresser — she’s too big to get underneath.  This wasn’t lessening.  I reached down, pinned Lady’s head to the floor between two of my fingers and told her, “Bad Lady.  No. No.”  I did this three times.  She left and laid down under the bed.

I had a book to read, so I laid on the bed to begin to read.  Not two minutes later, Rossie stretched out from under the dresser and everything was a blur after that. I believe Rossie went after Lady under the bed.  By the time I could stand up, they were fighting on the floor on the other side of the bed, Rossie in the submissive position and Lady looking like the aggressor.  Then they took off downstairs.  By the time I got downstairs (bad knees slows down how fast I can move, but I made better time than usual), Rossie was in the foot pedals of the pump organ and Lady was being aggressive.  I picked Lady up and put her in her cage, and Rossie took off.  I later found her under my bed, apparently no worse for the wear.

So I have Lady being aggressive, but Rossie was clearly the aggressor in this instance, even though Lady was the instigator.  Rossie wasn’t screaming, but there was definite noise from both parties.  Nobody was injured, although a lot of fur was flying.

Keeping Lady segregated isn’t lessening her desire to seek Rossie out.  It may, in some way, be making her more aggressive, because she’s a gregarious cat who likes to be with her humans.  I’ve read it’s not a good idea to let two cats who don’t like each other fight it out. But I can’t help wondering if it might be worth a try in this instance.

I’ve also received a suggestion to consider a mild sedative for Lady.  Lady goes in for her annual exam and shots next week.  I think it’s time to have another discussion with our veterinarian about what might be best.  I don’t want to re-home either of them — I don’t think Rossie would respond well to that, and I don’t think Lady should have to either; however, she might be happier in a house where she’s the only cat.

Or is there a Feline Total Transformation Program out there somewhere?  I might be willing to give it a try.